Some people crave stability and go by a strict schedule and thrive on normality. My life is anything but normal and anything that scheduled we are in constant survival mode at my house. You would think being an RBT (that is short for registered behavior, technician or otherwise known as a behavior therapist for autistic kids ) for five years that I would somehow know what to do when I have a three year-old son who is autistic and has high behavior problems. I won't say problems challenges his name is Uriah.  He's super smart. he's super cool kid, but the second things do not go his way we are flopped on the floor like a fainting goat. He is screaming, hitting our head on the walls, floors and on people thrashing himself backwards into only God would know what regardless of any danger, not paying one care paying no attention to any danger around him. To make matters worse things are not getting better. They’re getting worse with self injuries behaviors. We are now experiencing with him an increase in the headbanging with doing it a lot more forceful to the point where I thought if I ignore the behavior if he’s doing it for attention, he’ll stop so I tried that and unfortunately, he hit his head  even harder, multiple times , to the point where it caused him to get a concussion and he was not right or himself for three weeks I mean sometimes situations like that when they happen really make me hate autism. I just cried and cried and asked god to help my son and help us to understand and help him .  Don’t get me wrong I don’t hate people with autism by no means, I love each one I’ve ever met but I hate but what autism does to these people. What it’s doing to my son and my older stepson who’s 9 .  Daily I go through the heartbreaking task of getting my son dressed. For whatever reason he absolutely has a problem with getting dressed but something about it everyone causes massive panic and screams, eloping away , me getting upset then the other boy starts screaming a high pitched scream so Loud scary movies cannot even replicate. It’s a silent rule in my house if one screams then the other has to join in and scream as well.  Mot that our lives are bad we have learned to adjust and adapt along the way which is something that you would think would be easy since I work in ABA and starting a business training other professionals and parents in skills needed to provide better understanding and provide better care to anyone diagnosed with Autism Spectrum Disorder . I Should have all the necessary tools in my RBT toolbox to deal with everything easily, if you thought  this you would be wrong once Uriah was born  l was finally able to see what it was like from a parent perspective not just a therapist perspective looking in and why parents often don't follow the strict guidelines set by the child's program Unfortunately followed through with ABA is important and it needs to be across different environments to work for the long-term, which is why so many children end up back in therapy after having graduated ABA. My stepson prime example of this graduated after a few years of ABA services from a great place had it together as so it seemed to start school. Then once he got to school slowly behaviors came back and in the school is recommending ABA therapy again all because were not followed and continuously reinforced and some times slowly or fast behavior comes back but how can you get so many different people to cooperate to make that work you need the parents to cooperate. You need the mom and the dad to cooperate if they're in separate households which that is the case for my stepson you need anyone else in the family that's a caregiver at some point to be on the ball and then you also need it followed through at school. How can you get every single place in people all around to know exactly what to do when your child goes into a behavior to not reinforced that behavior? That is only just some of the stuff I wanna touch on in this blog and soon to be podcast subjects like what do I do as an autistic Mom with two children with autism while I'm in the grocery store and I've got one head, banging my car and screaming, and the other one screaming at the top of his lungs and trying to headbutt me at the same time because they do not want to be in the store they do not like shopping. Meanwhile, I have other parents and people looking at me like man you just need to whoop your kid how are you? Gonna let your kid just head, but you like that and not do anything and then you feel all of the judgments all around you you would think I would be used to tantrums seeing as how I deal with them on a daily regular basis at work but when you're an RT mom of autistic kids work never really stops. You're just in a constant state of work at that point, but I love all my kiddos. I love my kiddos. I love my babies at home. I would not change them not one bit if only for the better for them to broaden their own skills and abilities and hone in on their talents, I do believe that autistic kids, although they lack in some form shape or another in many ways sensory communication developmental. I believe they have other attributes that are enhanced to make up the difference. I know that is especially true with Grayson and Uriah my two your eyes is two years old and he has taught himself how to read words he knows his multiplication at times by 510s 34 count by twos all the way to 100 and plus we've counted all the way up to 200 actually before he understands letters and numbers like it's just incredible to me and picked it up at an early age, he knew his alphabet before he knew how to talk and he picked up on sign language fast like he picked up on everything. He learned fast but we have some communication delays. We have some speech, not coming out clearly and we have this massive behavior issue that I'm dealing with. He is going to be going to a second assessment to see if he can get a clinical diagnosis of autism because the first time we tried we're unable to get it. They didn't see his delay in communication yet because he wasn't speaking yet but now it's very apparent description the repeating I'm sure if you're reading this you know what I'm talking about so now he's doing all of the things and we are going to go for our second assessment. Nobody wanted to believe me when I said you had autism at first my husband still doesn't it's a big disagreement we have but working with autistic children on a daily basis. I knew the signs I had a brother that was autistic myself and I still haven't actually two brothers one with Asperger's one with autism. I know that there is other people out there like me who thrive from the chaos who, despite all of the challenges that I faced on a daily basis come to learn and appreciate each, and every individual child that I come in contact with informed some sort of relationship with and count each one as a blessing in my heart there's a little spot in my heart, literally for each one of them and that's a blessing. I'm blessed. I'm blessed to do what I do. I'm blessed to have the knowledge that I do to try to make a difference in this world I really just want some like input back from the community on. How can we better generalize what these kids are learning in therapy in the home and public setting how do I differentially reinforce my child's behavior at the grocery store so that I can shop and not get stairs because my son is hollering at the ceiling or throwing himself onto the floor so my blog is chaos and coffee coffee being my preferred reinforcer today. Im drinking hot coffee today strong coffee to give me the willpower and the strength  To continue working on my new website working on this new

blog. Bounce between being a creator and mother and full time Employee as well as as a Round the clock RBT/Behavior Consultant at home only with the help of  my daughter Alexia Moore, who is 19. yes you heard that right I have a 19-year-old. I also have a 3 year-old, and a  18 year-old my two oldest or girls from my first marriage. They are not autistic. My oldest is an RBT herself (trained by myself) and is in school right now to become a BCBA I've taught her everything she knows and she is so awesome. She literally is like the better version of me it's like me 2.0 my other daughter is still finishing up high school but she is gonna be graduating with honors worked so hard playing Basketball and has two jobs. Both my girls work two jobs actually and on top of that, my oldest babysits for me so that I can work full-time, and my stepson is here to grace us with his presence every single weekend plus a little more here and there I love my family. I love my husband, Jon?  my daughters  is Alexia and Amirah My little Uriah (the cape wearing super hero of the family) and Grayson ALL are  my precious babies. I think we're gonna have fun telling the world our story.